Turn Your Teenager into a Smart Shopper 
by Adrian Gentilcore 

This idea is a very simple one to implement, but it is very powerful and will have lifetime effects. The best way to teach children how to handle money is to give them some, then arrange for them to spend it under very carefully controlled conditions.

This doesn't mean that your child won't make mistakes; of course they will, but wouldn't you rather have them make a few harmless mistakes at this stage than large, life-altering mistakes at a later date, which may put them into significant debt? 

One of the largest and most controllable expenses in the family budget is the grocery bill. Obviously, we all have to eat, but there is a huge variety in the
selection and pricing of grocery items. You can dine like a king on steak and lobster or eat like a pauper on peanut butter sandwiches and boxed macaroni and cheese - it all depends on your budget and your smart shopping skills. 

Turning your teenager into a smart grocery shopper at a very early age can literally save them thousands of dollars in their lifetime. I don't know about your kids, but I have three boys - ages 20, 13 & 3. So long as there was sufficient food in the fridge or the pantry, NONE of them had ever shown any significant interest in the cost of groceries. Nor were they likely to unless I gave them a darn good reason. Understandable, I suppose. So I made a deal with them - at least the two older ones (I did excuse my 3 year old from this exercise - for now anyway!). I would put them in total charge of the family grocery shopping. Yes, I can hear your gasps from here, but I assure you, we did not end up with a steady diet of frozen pizza, soda pop and cheese whiz! 

The deal was that Mom would supply the list and the money. Fortunately, my 20-year-old can drive, so I did not have to supply the transportation. They could take as much time as they liked and shop at whatever store(s) they preferred, but they were required to purchase everything on the list and stay within their budget. Just to make it a little more challenging, I gave them cash to give them a little less margin for error. 

If you have teenagers, you can imagine how enthusiastic my guys were about this program (NOT!) However, I did add a little something to sweeten the pot for them and I think this is the beauty part of the deal. Every dollar they saved on the grocery shopping could be used for those things near and dear to a teenager's heart - soda pop, pizza, cookies, magazines, or even the latest CD down at the mall. Pretty much anything they wanted within reason. Let me
tell you, after coming up with only $3 worth of incentive money on the first trip, these guys got real interested in coupons, best value buys, weekly specials, you name it. The thought of a potential $15-$20 a week in unclaimed incentive money nearly drove them crazy. 

In the first few months of this program, I think they learned some very good lessons that I couldn't have taught them any other way. What lessons did they
learn? They learned that meat marked "reduced for quick sale" doesn't always work out well, they learned that generic vegetables and cereal don't taste the
same but are tolerable, and they learned that hoarding their incentive money for trips to the mall meant suffering through a week with no soda, chips, or other goodies. They learned how to choose the best vegetables and meat. They learned how to compare supermarket ads, and mostly they learned what a lot of work their mother has gone through for the last twenty years to keep food on the table for them. Like the commercial says - some things really are priceless. 

Was I bribing my own children? YOU BET! I believe 100% in a good bribe, especially if it will teach them something. These boys are going to be living out on their own someday and I don't want them running home to Mom and Dad to come and bail them out. 'Cuz, I'll tell ya, Mom and Dad just plain don't have it. Like a whole lot of other people, we are a very middle class paycheck-to-paycheck type family and we have enough trouble dealing with our own debt problems, let alone have to fork over money for the kids once they are grown. And that is the real reason I wanted to do this program with my kids, because neither of our families took the time to teach us anything of significance about money. That lack of knowledge has cost us many thousands of dollars in interest payments and many years of just scraping by on day-to-day needs so we can pay off the credit card bills and too-high car
payments. I didn't want our boys to grow up the same way and have to go through the same struggles with their own families. 

Obviously, a program like this is fairly simple to set up, but here are a few pointers that might help you avoid some problems. First of all, your research can make or break this program. In order to make this work properly you have to be a really good estimator so you can determine the full price of the groceries very close to the mark. If you aim too high, they will think it is a piece of cake and you will be out some serious dough for incentive items. Too little and they get discouraged at not having a very big incentive, though it was a great learning experience to have the embarrassment of putting things back when they went over budget a couple of times. Such are the realities of shopping with cash. However, for the first few trips, you may want to keep it fairly simple - twenty or so items, rather than a whole week's worth of
shopping, especially if your kids are younger - I think this program works best with kids about 14-18. At 12, Matt was a little too young and at 20, Ryan was
a little too old and too busy with other things. 

I think sometimes the negotiations between them were a little more in Ryan's favor than Matt's - one of the hazards of an expanded family like ours. It took them a while to get the hang of it. One interesting thing that I did was to not allow them to use a calculator. Quite frankly, I stink at math and I don't want my boys to grow up with this deficiency. Therefore, I take every opportunity to push them to use their math skills in real world settings. I will frequently ask
them to work out sale prices in stores (quick, what's 30% off these $29.99 jeans?) and making my 12-year-old act as a human calculator for the groceries was great learning experience for him. He wouldn't say so, but I
think Matt actually enjoyed the challenge! 

One unexpected problem we had was dividing the loot. We had naively assumed that 50/50 was the way to go in dividing the incentive money, however we ended up refereeing a surprising amount of fights over this
issue. One boy (usually the oldest) felt like he had put in more effort in coupon clipping and finding the deals and therefore deserved a larger share of the reward. (Truth be told, I think he was in the right on this one, but I didn't want to take sides). Or the younger one would complain that his brother and his
friends drank up all the "incentive" soda (they did, but heaven forbid that Dad and I would dare touch it!). Matt always wanted to spend his incentive on toys and goodies, while Ryan was in that "starving teenager" stage and wanted the junk food. We finally resolved the problem by letting them shop alternate weeks. 

I suggest that you go with your kid(s) on the first trip or two to give them a few pointers, such as how to select fruits and vegetables, safe handling of meat
products, etc., but please refrain from giving any pointers on prices. That is part of the learning process. However, you must be prepared to show a little flexibility. They most likely will have a completely different style of shopping than you do, or may want to use different stores than you do. You may end up eating some mushy vegetables or bruised apples, and you might hear a complaint or two from your husband if they switch the family to single-ply
generic toilet paper. Tell him to just grin and bear it, and be sure to compliment your kids on the good choices they do make. Hearing your appreciation and positive comments are an important part of the program
and will make them feel like they are making a valuable contribution to the family. They are, and isn't it nice to sit in the car or sit at home and read a magazine while the shopping gets done? Hey, Moms need all the breaks they can get! 

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