The New Father Fog
by Michael T. Powers

I will always remember when I found out I was going to be a father for the first time. 

My beloved bride Kristi, has been extremely creative in how she tells me I am going to be a father. When she knew she was pregnant with our first son, Caleb, she took me to a nice restaurant for dinner. At the end of our delicious meal the waitress handed me the bill and a sealed envelope. She told me it was from someone in the restaurant. I looked around, looking for familiar faces, but found none. I opened it and started to read the typed message. In the mean time, all the employees, including the chefs from the kitchen, started moving to a closer proximity to our table.

The message read, "Michael, this is to inform you that you will be changing the kitty litter for the next nine months. In other words, congratulations, you are going to be a father!" 

I looked across the table at my beloved wife, with disbelief on my face. "How did this happen!" flashed through my head. I remembered the talk my father had with me long ago, so I knew how it happened, but I wanted to know HOW this had happened! I started bawling like a baby. I had wanted to have children all seven years of our marriage, but Kristi wanted to wait. It was not something we had planned, and I wasn't emotionally  ready for it. So there I sat, tears streaming down my face, surrounded by my now crying wife, a bunch of sobbing waitresses, and a couple of chefs who went back into the kitchen in a hurry. Either they were hiding their tears, or they couldn't stand to see a male show his feelings so openly in front of the opposite sex. 

The next eight months were filled with anticipation and moments of wonder. I remember hearing the sound of my baby's heartbeat for the first time. Nothing prepares you for the realization that a train is growing inside the women you love. Yes, that is exactly what Caleb's heartbeat sounded like to me. I know that doesn't sound too exciting or romantic, but to me it was incredible.

I remember watching my wife's tummy grow, longing for the day when I would be able to feel Caleb moving inside of her. We would sit for long periods of time, my hands pressed gently against her abdomen, waiting for Caleb to move. Most of the time he wouldn't, and I would pray that God would give him the hiccups just so I could feel my son through the thin layer of skin and muscle that protected him from the outside world. 

And then I felt him for the first time. I waited breathlessly for him to move again, not believing that it actually happened. I can only imagine what it must feel like for Kristi to sense her offspring moving from the inside out.

As I waited for the day of his birth, I would have dreams of seeing him for the first time; intensely vivid dreams of a baby's face that would stay with me long after sleep ended.  Looking back now, I am amazed at how long, and how short, nine months can be.

We never did get to rush off to the hospital like you see on TV.  Caleb decided he liked it too much inside the womb, and after being 3 weeks overdue, the doctors decided to induce labor. So there we sat in the hospital waiting for something to happen.  Kristi had wanted a CD player in the room so she could listen to relaxing music as she went through the huffing, puffing, and pushing. I thought it would be funny to put in a CD by Salt-N-Peppa and play their song called "Push It." So as soon as I was sufficiently bored of waiting, I turned the CD player on and out blasted:

"PUSH IT! PUSH IT GOOD!"

I was so proud of my little joke.

When I looked up, I saw Kristi and her mom giving me the death stare. Not even a crack of a smile. I was grinning from ear to ear, but realized that if I wanted to be a part of this miracle and stay in the room I, had better turn it off in a hurry and put some soothing music on. To this day they don't think it was funny, while I am still laughing out loud  as I write this. In their defense, Kristi tells me that the music was so loud that they couldn't make out the words. 

Labor finally set in. Twenty hours of labor that is. And at the end of the twenty hours, Caleb's big head was stuck in the drain, and the doctor told us he would have to do a C-Section. At this point I was a little worried, but trusted that God and the doctors knew what they were doing.

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