Inside MainStreetMom

Family Budget    Crafts    Parenting    Just for Mom        Health & Fitness        Spiritual Growth        Working at Home    Home & Hearth        Gardening        Cookbook Corner    Family        Kids        Marriage        Education        Fun & Games    Pregnancy    Printable Lists    Our Columnists Low Credit Card Info Here

MSM Tools

Search MainStreetMom    Site Map    Discussion Boards    Newsletters    WAH Bulletin Board    E-Greetings    What Are You Worth?

Visit with Other MainStreetMoms...
Stay-at-home moms
Baby Care 
Toddlers
Teenagers
Family Budget
Decorating
Organizing
Cooking
Playgroups
Odds & Ends

Ten Tips for a More Blessed and Less Stressed Christmas
by Marsha Jordan

Does your Christmas spirit get lost in the whirlwind of holiday activity? Like the Grinch, we all must face the fact that Christmas is coming whether we're ready for it or not, so let's learn some strategies for not only surviving the holidays, but for going from stressed to blessed.

Tame your inner Grinch by creating a simpler, more joyful Christmas. Here are tips to help you go from overwhelmed to overjoyed.

TIPS for a MORE MEANINGFUL HOLIDAY:
1) Lower Expectations
2) Change Your Routine
3) Don't Do Everything Yourself
4) Plan Ahead
5) Spend Less Money
6) Simplify Gift Giving
7) Celebrate Family and Community
8) Create Meaningful Memories
9) Combat the Greedies
10) Create Fun New Traditions

THEN . . . RELAX

1) LOWER EXPECTATIONS: You'll make yourself crazy comparing your home, your holiday, your family, with anyone or anything that makes you feel less than perfect. Remember, YOU ARE NOT MARTHA STEWART! Stop trying to win the perfect holiday award for the best cookies, the most elaborate decorations, or the biggest gifts. Remember these four important words throughout the holiday season: DO LESS, ENJOY MORE.

2) TAMPER WITH TRADITIONS: Why do we feel that we must continue forever to do things just as we've always done them? Don't be bound by past traditions. Think outside the box and consider new ways of doing things to make it easier on yourself.

A) Instead of exchanging gifts with co-workers or extended family , how about choosing a charity to help? If each person gives just a couple of dollars, it adds up and beats searching for the perfect gift for all those people.

B) Who says you HAVE to cook a huge meal for 30 people every year? Could you, maybe just this once, have a simple gathering instead? Better yet, let Aunt Irma take a turn at hosting this year's celebration. Have you considered suggesting that everyone bring a dish so all the burden doesn't fall on you? Maybe this year the women could cook and all other family members could do the clean up -- as a special Christmas gift to those who worked hard to provide the meal.

C) When did we decide we needed 37 different kinds of Christmas cookies ? The only kind my family REALLY wants are chocolate chip! Why do more than is necessary to please them? I choose two or three of our favorites and leave it at that. If you MUST have a variety of cookies, go to or host a cookie exchange where everybody bakes one type but takes home several of all the other varieties.

3) DON'T DO IT ALL YOURSELF: Involve every member of the family right down to the toddlers. If you can't do it together, then maybe it's not something you need to do at all. Turn decorating, shopping, gift-wrapping, baking, and even house cleaning into family time activities

4) PLAN AHEAD: Work smarter, not harder. Do as much as you can in the months before Christmas to leave December open for spontaneous joy. Get the car serviced in the Fall so it will be ready for holiday travel, bake and freeze cookies throughout November, start addressing Christmas card envelopes during the summer while you're sitting in the sun sipping lemonade. If it's too late to plan ahead and you're already in the middle of mass chaos, don't panic. Memorize the Serenity Prayer and repeat it daily! (God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference!) Drop all activities that are not absolutely essential. One year I sent New Years cards (or was it Valentine's Day?) and people appreciated them more because they had time to actually sit down and read the news included in them.

5) SPEND LESS MONEY: Nothing adds stress to the season like worrying about how you'll pay the credit card bill come January. Remember that it's the thought that counts. Think of creative gifts you can give that cost less but express your love. Limit the amount you will spend on each gift.

A) Tell those on your gift list that instead of presents this year, you'll be providing warm clothing and food for a needy child or sending a donation to your favorite charity in their honor. Chances are they really don't need anything anyway, and it will warm their hearts to know you're doing good in their name.

B) Keep a journal of all your expenditures. Know each day how much you've spent so far. You will probably be shocked to learn how fast it adds up and this knowlege may help you control your spending.

B) Stay out of stores as much as possible. Every time you step foot into a mall, you are subjected to clever marketing tactics. Shop fast. The more time you spend in the store, the more money it will cost you.

C) Consider inexpensive but heartwarming gifts like handmade frames filled with favorite photos or cassette tapes of your family reading books. Home made breads, jams, or sauces make great gifts that everyone appreciates; and creating them provides family time to boot.

D) One year, my family had great fun cutting evergreen boughs and making wreaths for everyone on our gift list. All we had to buy was wire and ribbon.

E) How about giving a few of your own special treasures as gifts? Perhaps a book you love or a special knick knack or piece of jewelry someone has admired? A gift that's worth more than anything from a store is a handwritten letter telling someone how much they mean to you.

F) Coupons for housecleaning, babysitting, or lawn work are great gifts you can give for people to use throughout the year. You've heard of the fruit of the month club? Start your own "dessert of the month club." What fun! Give coupons good for a different dessert that you will make and deliver (and share) every month for the coming year.

If you must shop, a list is your best friend. To avoid impulse buying, buy only what's on your list and pay only with cash. You'll think twice before purchasing an extravagant gift you really can't afford.

6) SIMPLIFY GIFT SHOPPING:

A) Plan ahead, make a list, and stick to it. Shop throughout the year rather than doing it all at the last minute. If you plan to give homemade gifts, you can work on them throughout the year and have them read long before the holiday season begins. If you're really organized and get your shopping finished early, you can even wrap your gifts in the summer and store them away till December. (Yes, that IS possible if you plan well in advance)

B) Instead of individual gifts, buy one item for an entire family such as a board game, fast food coupons, gift certificates for restaurants or stores, phone cards, school supplies, or food baskets. Or exchange names within your family so everyone needs to buy only one gift, rather than many. I've heard of families who stipulated that it had to be a garage-sale or a thrift-store item under a certain price. That made it a lot of fun, as everyone tried to find the best buy.

C) Divide up the shopping. Maybe the wife could purchase all the gifts required for women and the husband buy all the men's gifts. Teens can select gifts for kids their age too.

D) Choose a gift theme each year. If the theme is plants, you would give everyone something from a nursery. If the theme is books, you would buy all your gifts at a book store. If you choose a theme of entertainment, you would buy movie passes for everyone or concert tickets. If there are a lot of men on your gift list, a hardware theme might be appropriate. One year, I gave each family a Christmas centerpiece or decoration. (and I made all of them.) If you're forgetful like I am, giving everyone on your list the same thing makes it easier to remember what you gave whom in past years!

7) CELEBRATE FAMILY and COMMUNITY: Schedule time for fun and relaxing together. Make it your top priority and put it on your calendar. Don't let anything get in your way. If you're too busy to drive through the neighborhood with the kids looking at the lights and listening to Christmas music, re-arrange your schedule or eliminate some other activity that doesn't include quality family time. Spend an evening as a family reading Christmas stories or poems and writing letters together, (maybe even one to Santa, thanking him for last year's gifts).

If you must shop or attend concerts or parties, don't go alone. Take the family along and include lonely neighbors or elderly friends too. This applies to cooking, baking, and gift wrapping too.

Invite someone to do it with you. It will make your tasks more fun and they'll appreciate spending time with you. Whatever you're planning to do, share it with someone and make it quality time. Think you're just too busy and have too much to accomplish, and taking someone along will slow you down? That's a sure sign that you NEED to slow down. Remember your priority and commitment to putting people first and enjoying the season, not hurrying through it. Drop any activities that you can live without. Years from now, will it matter if you did not attend the office Christmas party? But if you spend time with your children or a friend, it will create memories that will last a life time.

8) CREATE LASTING, LOVING MEMORIES: Be selective. Don't fill every moment of the season with frantic activity. Think quality, not quantity. Your goal should be sharing happy times and being together. Reading stories together, a relaxed tree-trimming, singing carols, making snow angels, or just enjoying the evening stars and sharing a cup of hot cocoa can be more enjoyable than attending every play, concert, and party of the season. Volunteer as a family to sort food at a food bank, organize a toy or coat drive, deliver meals on wheels, or serve Christmas dinner at a shelter. These are memories you'll cherish forever.

9) TAME THE GREEDIES: Steer the family's focus toward the needs of others and how your family can render service. Help everyone to develop an attitude of gratitude instead of always wanting something more. Talk about ways to share the season's joy with others. Instead of wish lists, make a list of ways to practice generosity. These might include helping someone with shoveling, shopping, decorating, or baking. Or choose a volunteer project you can work on together as a family.

Keep the TV turned off as much as possible to avoid commercials. They only give your kids ideas of more useless things they think they must have. If you want to watch a Christmas show, rent the video or record programs and watch them later.

10) CREATE FUN NEW TRADITIONS: Buy a new cookie cutter each year to add to a collection, or shop as a family to buy an early Christmas present for yourselves: a board game you can play each evening in December. Share at the dinner table every night something you've each read such as a Christmas story or poem, a riddle, or holiday trivia.

A friend began a tradition of having boiled shrimp for Christmas dinner, along with garlic toast, salad, and Christmas eggs (boiled eggs dyed red and green). Preparation for this meal takes almost no time at all, and the cleanup is equally easy. Everyone can enjoy the afternoon visiting, playing games, napping, etc. In the evening, they enjoy leftover shrimp fried in garlic butter with the traditional Christmas pies and cookies.

Here are a couple of traditions that can lighten your work load: Instead of an elaborate holiday meal, how about having friends in for a potluck Christmas Eve supper where they do most of the work and you provide only the dessert? Another tradition kids love is going out for pizza on Christmas Eve.

It's the little things that make life more meaningful. I like the idea of starting a Christmas tradition of practicing not-so-random acts of kindness each holiday season and maybe even extending this "kindness throughout the year. It can be fun to anonymously mail a check to a family you know is struggling financially. Kids will love secretly leaving a basket of goodies on someone's porch, ringing the door bell, then sneaking away.

ITEMS 7 THROUGH 10 CAN ALL BE ACCOMPLISHED THROUGH VOLUNTEERING to focus on others and help someone outside your family. Kids love to give and help. They just need encouragement, guidance, and opportunities to reach out.

Volunteering is a great way to teach children compassion. It develops character, leadership, self esteem and a sense of community. Volunteering also helps offset the materialism of our culture. To take the "Christmas gimmes," the key is finding a cause the whole family can identify with.

One creative idea is to set up a gift-wrapping station in a mall to raise money for a charity. A great way to volunteer that can involve kids of every age would be to visit nursing homes and maybe even take holiday decorations that your family has made. Here's another suggestion: Find some children who need cheery mail and work as a family making cards for them. There are hundreds of such children in need of smiles featured on the HUGS and HOPE Club's web site at www.hugsandhope.org. Your family can also sponsor a child for Christmas through the Hugs and Hope Elf Program. It's fun to shop for and wrap items from your sponsored child's wish list.

When you drop all the activities that aren't essential and focus on enjoying friends and family, you can RELAX:

To enjoy this season, we must remember what is truly important. All ten of our suggestions involve togetherness, sharing, helping, enjoying, savoring the moments. The events of 9-11 have taught us that our time and the people in our lives are precious. This Christmas will be a season filled with opportunities to reach out to and enjoy others. Don't miss them! Commit to spending more "down time" with others just hanging out -- it's more important than you may think. Experience really feeling the joy of the season. Make it a "feel good" holiday season rather than a "look good," one-day, picture-perfect event. Create a warmer, more loving celebration by focusing on sharing and just being.

Now that you've learned how to tame your inner Grinch . . . turn on the tree lights, gather your loved ones around you, and RELAX. Like George Bailey, you'll be able to say it really is "A Wonderful Life."